Battlescars: A Rock & Roll Romance Read online

  “Aubrey, can we repeat last night? The hotel where we’re staying only has one bedroom suites.”

  “I guess.” She shrugged.

  “Good, then it’s settled.” I said smugly.

  Another night snuggling in bed with Aubrey was just what the doctor ordered.

  CHAPTER THREE

  Blood, Sex, & Booze

  Aubrey

  We arrived at the Millennium Hotel without as much as one photographer lurking. It was a total three-sixty from New York. Jake checked us into our room without a hitch. Granted there was a man behind the counter, but still. Since it was pretty low-key, he told Brett to go out and have fun. Brett looked as if he wanted to argue, but Jake wasn’t having it. It was just the two of us. I didn’t want to tell him why I was such a bitch on the plane. It was childish and stupid. Luckily, he was easily placated and seemed to be over it already. I was actually kind of hurt the way he reacted to me putting myself out there, trying to be sexy. He completely ignored me and then accused me of being wound to tight. It didn’t help that he made me feel things that I haven’t felt before. I wasn’t sure what to do about them, yet.

  He rolled our luggage down the hallway and stuck the keycard in the door. He held the door open and gestured for me to go in. I walked into the room and looked around. We had a small little area with a couch and two chairs. Our balcony overlooked Quincy Market in downtown Boston. We had a king sized bed with a fluffy, white comforter. I walked over and flopped onto the bed. Jake came and sat beside me. I looked at him and gave him a shy half-smile. He smiled back and it made my tummy do a somersault. I moved so that my head was resting on his leg. He rubbed my hair soothingly. He grabbed the remote and clicked the TV on. Since there wasn’t anything good on, we decided to watch a movie. I moved so that we could get more comfortable. He wrapped his arm around me, and I snuggled on his shoulder. It was bizarre to be able to do this kind of thing. I honestly didn’t think it could ever be possible for me again.

  Around dinnertime Jake asked if I wanted to go out to dinner. I was still tired, so he ordered us room service instead. We decided on bacon cheddar burgers and onion rings. After dinner, I fetched my pajamas out of my suitcase and headed to shower. I locked the door and took a good, long look in the mirror. I was self-conscious of what I saw, and it wasn’t my body. Afterwards, I brushed those thoughts aside and hopped in the shower. I brushed my teeth and put on a pair of flannel pajama pants and a long sleeve shirt on. When I went back into the room, Jake was on the phone with Derek. I curled up in bed and watched him talk. His voice was so sexy, I could listen to him talk all day long. He hung up and kissed the top of my head before going to shower.

  While he was in the shower, I started thinking about how we might actually be compatible. We both had scars from our past. Maybe it could work? If only I wasn’t such a chicken shit. I started feeling sleepy when Jake walked into the room. He just had a towel wrapped around his waist. He let it drop and I got a view of his glorious backside. Holy hotness! He slid into a pair of boxers and climbed into bed next to me. He wrapped his arm around me and placed his hand in mine.

  “Sweet Dreams, Aubrey.”

  “You too, Jake.”

  Jake

  I was glad that Aubrey had a good time on our un-official date yesterday. I took her to the New England Aquarium. Her favorite were the sea lions. We walked around by the wharf, and I only had to sign three autographs, which was a new record low. Score! I took her to Faneuil Hall. We window shopped, and I bought her a shirt that says, “I only date boys with tattoos.” She picked the Hard Rock Café for lunch. I was recognized there, but they moved us to where it was more private so we wouldn’t be disturbed. She smiled the entire time.

  The past few days were the best that I had in years. Plus, I was getting the much-needed relaxation that I wanted. Everything was better when she was around. She admitted that she was pissed on how I reacted to her trying to be sexy. I told her she was the sexiest thing I’ve ever seen. She smacked me and called me a liar. So I kissed her.

  I called Blake while Aubrey was in the bathroom getting ready for the show. I wanted to make sure everything was good for the show tonight. I was mid-sentence when Aubrey walked into the room, my breath hitched. I ended the call without another word. She looked phenomenal. Her hair was curled, and she had on a little more make-up than usual. She had on her new shirt, the one I bought her yesterday. She paired it with a black tutu, fishnets and a pair of knee high Doc’s. I wiped the drool off my face and went to the dresser and picked up my lucky leather bracelet. I fastened it in place. I needed a distraction before I threw her on the bed and ravished her. We certainly weren’t at that point yet. I wondered how she packed all that shit into that tiny suitcase. I was going to have to ask her for pointers. I usually just ended up throwing clothes out and buying new ones.

  Aubrey

  We arrived at the venue a couple hours early so Jake could do his sound check before the show. He said a lot of bands had their roadies do it, but he liked to do it himself. Today he sang ‘Afflicted’ by Age of Daze. His voice was so damn sinful. Brett was standing next to me keeping a close eye on things. He seemed to be in a better mood today too. Jake hopped off the stage and picked me up. He spun us around a couple times and kissed my nose.

  “Are you excited about tonight?” He asked.

  I grinned excitedly. I was actually really looking forward to watching another one of their shows. Just seeing Jake on stage was something to look forward to. It was entrancing. We headed backstage to join the rest of the guys. Jake ordered pizza and beer for everyone, and we ate in the dressing room while the opener was on. I couldn’t really hear them, but from what I could hear they sounded good. I watched Jake bobbing his head along with the beat and smiled. When it was time for them to go on I walked to the side of the stage with him. I gave him a good luck kiss as he was taking the stage.

  “Boston! ARE YOU GUYS READY TO ROCK?” He yelled. “We’re going to start with a cover song tonight. This one goes out to my Bellissimo. You know who you are.”

  The thundering roar reverberated through the stadium.

  “WELL COME ON!” Jake screamed and jumped three feet in the air.

  It was completely enthralling.

  The band broke into Hinder’s ‘Heaven Sent.’ It was about an angel saving him from his hell. The more I listened to the lyrics, the more I wondered if he was singing it about me because I felt the same way about him. He was saving me from my own hell. I was amazed how much better I slept the last couple nights because he was there. I was still apprehensive, but it lessened with each day we spent together. It was going to be an uphill battle for sure, but with time who knows.

  The Boston crowd was out of control. People were crowd surfing and moshing. Jake kept sneaking glances in my direction and winking. The guys had so much passion and enthusiasm tonight that it was insane. Battlescars finished out their set and killed it. They bid the crowd goodnight and exited the stage. After the show, we were going to an after party at a club downtown. Jake came off the stage dripping sweat and kissed me lightly. I looked into his blue eyes completely mesmerized at the intensity. I realized in that moment that if I had to leave Jake right now, I would be heartbroken. I was absolutely scared to death because the first time in a long time I felt vulnerable. My mentality for the past five years was, ‘I’ll keep you out and stay safe rather than taking a risk and winding up hurt.’ With Jake, I was taking a huge risk.

  I watched Jake change his shirt and put on a clean, white t-shirt. I wished that I could get close enough to look at all his tattoos. He took my hand and led me to the door. There was a limo waiting outside to take the band to the club. We all climbed in and drove across town.

  “Dude, we fucking brought it tonight!” Derek yelled.

  “Yeah we did.” Blake said smugly.

  Kevin just sat there with a smile.

  “What did you think, Aubrey?” Jake asked me.

  “I thought it was thoroughl
y entertaining. You guys did a really an amazing job.” I said shyly.

  Jake rubbed his thumb over my hand and smiled thoughtfully.

  When we arrived at the club, the event security let us in through the VIP entrance. The place was jam-packed. It smelled like sweat and booze. Bodies were writhing all over and people kept bumping into us. Jake held me close to his side and headed towards the back. We spotted an empty booth near the corner and climbed in. I was happy when Kevin decided to sit with us. Brett stood next to the table to keep the crowd at bay. It didn’t stop a couple hopefuls from trying to get to Jake.

  Krewella’s ‘Alive’ was pulsing through the speakers. I started talking to Kevin since I haven’t had the chance before. He was really smart, but super shy. He had a girlfriend back in LA that was studying to be a doctor and said the after parties weren’t his forte. Jake was in his own world. He seemed annoyed that I wasn’t paying attention to him, but I ignored him. It was starting to get towards the end of the night, and the music had changed to a more hardcore beat. The crowd was starting to get obstreperous. Girls were losing their tops and dancing on tables. There were a couple fights going on and even more brewing. A majority of the patrons looked beyond drunk. I was glad to be safely tucked into a corner sipping on my beer.

  Jake

  I was getting extremely fucking pissed off at Kevin. I wanted to spend time with Aubrey, and he was totally monopolizing her. They were deep in conversation, and I was getting angrier by the minute. The one guy that I thought I wouldn’t have to worry about was flirting with the one girl that I wanted. Besides, he has a fucking girlfriend that’s going to be a doctor. Aubrey’s mine! I was watching Blake and Derek out on the dance floor. They were having a ball. I took another long sip of my beer when I noticed a girl that kept checking me out. Maybe if I make Aubrey jealous she’ll break. I stood up, and she barely even took notice.

  Aubrey

  I noticed a voluptuous redhead that kept looking over. She was checking out Jake. I ignored her and went back to talking to Kevin. After about a half an hour, Jake slid out from the booth and walked over to her. She whispered something to him. He laughed and nodded. She threw her arms around him and kissed him vehemently. I felt bile rise in my throat. He took a step back with red lipstick smeared all over his mouth. He smiled triumphantly. I couldn’t watch anymore. I stood to leave. As soon as I took a step Jake walked back over and put his arm around me. I moved out of his grasp and pushed him away.

  “Don’t fucking touch me! Go chase your fame and fortune. I’m done!” I huffed.

  “I’m not after fame and fortune. I’m after you!” He yelled.

  “Really? Kissing some girl is a funny way of showing me that you care.” I spat.

  “Well, if you weren’t fucking flirting with Kevin all night maybe I wouldn’t have done it.”

  I lifted my hand and smacked his cheek. I focused on the dance floor trying to push past him. Nonpoint’s ‘Everybody Down’ came on and transformed an already unruly bunch and made them fucking insane. They were jumping up and down and bouncing into one another. I just wanted to leave. I saw Blake making out with some skanky blonde girl. She was rubbing her hands up and down his chest when another guy came over. He grabbed Blake by the shirt and instigated a shoving match. The girl stood there screaming. A small group started to gather around them. Jake tensed up, but didn’t make a move to help. He was too intent on watching me. Brett seemed to be hesitating whether to break it up or not, but I knew that he wouldn’t leave Jake.

  “That’s my girlfriend, asshole.” The guy yelled.

  “Hey, she told me that she was single. Take that up with her, not me bro.”

  The guy cold-cocked Blake right in the face. A minute later, Derek walked out of the bathroom zipping up his pants. There was yet another random girl hanging on his arm. As soon as he saw what was happening he pushed her out of the way. He ran over and grabbed Blake. Jake officially called it a night.

  “It’s called blood, sex and booze. I swear it’s a curse.” Kevin whispered to me.

  Everything that I felt for Jake earlier was out the window. We climbed into the limo. Blake held a napkin to his bloody nose. I sat as far away from Jake as the small space would allow. He looked distraught and kept staring at me. Fuck him! As soon as we were back at the hotel I sprinted to the elevator and hit the button before he could catch me. I grabbed my suitcase from our room and stormed out. I body-checked him on the way down the hallway. He tried to grab my arm, but I maneuvered out of his grasp. Brett said something to him, and he stopped. I went to the front desk and used the company credit card to get my own room. While I was waiting the elevator door opened. There stood Jake with red lipstick still staining his mouth. I turned and started walking away from him. I’d rather sleep on a park bench than be anywhere near him at this point.

  “Stop. Aubrey, wait a minute!” He yelled.

  “Fuck you, Jake Parker!” I screamed.

  I walked out the front door of the hotel and made a left. He was running after me. I started walking down the street. I didn’t care that it was two in the morning, or that I had no clue where I was. I knew he was right behind me, but I forged on anyway. I turned the corner and walked right into a large body. I fell right on my ass. I looked up and saw that it was Brett. He reached his hand out to help me to my feet. I crossed my legs and sat unmoving on the ground. I also didn’t give a shit that I was acting like a five year old. Jake was not my boyfriend. I had no claim to him, and after tonight I didn’t want one either. So what if he could touch me? Maybe I was over my aversion.

  Jake kneeled down in front of me.

  “Are you done?” He asked comically. My fury spiked.

  “Get away from me!” I shrieked.

  I stumbled to my feet and started back on my path.

  Brett really looked as if he wanted to do something to block me. I glared at him. He shrugged and stepped out of my way. Jake continued following me. He started singing ‘Brown Eyed Girl’ at the top of his lungs. I wanted to laugh. I wanted to cry. I wanted to scream. I kept walking until we had gone at least a mile. Tonight sucked and I just wanted to go to bed. I stopped and turned around. Jake looked stupefied.

  “Fine, you don’t want to stop and talk to me? I’m going to talk anyway. You ignored me all night, Aubrey. You hurt my feelings, so I hurt yours. I know it wasn’t the right thing to do, but you get under my skin!”

  “Go fuck one of your groupies and leave me alone, Jake!”

  “Come on, don’t be like this. I don’t want a groupie. I want you.”

  “Too fucking bad!” I screamed.

  “Hey, I told you that I could be an asshole sometimes. Tonight was a stellar example.”

  “Exactly. I don’t want to deal with that kind of thing, Jake. I won’t.” I turned to look at him.

  “Maybe if you would fucking let me in, I would be able to understand.”

  “Fuck you! I’ve known you for less than a week. I didn’t deserve that, Jake. So what, I was talking to Kevin. Did you stop to think that maybe I would want to know the people in your band? I did it because they’re important to you! Before tonight, I thought I liked you. If you could be like you were yesterday, I might even say that we could even have something. After tonight, you have about as much of a chance as a cold day in hell. I’m staying in my own room tonight.” I stalked forward.

  He stood there defeated.

  “Everybody leaves. I guess I should expect the same from you.” He called after me.

  I stopped in my tracks. I turned and looked at him. It was his trump card, and he knew it. We both had huge trust issues. His stemmed from abandonment mine were from being hurt in the past.

  “I’m still here, aren’t I? I just don’t want to be around you right now. I especially don’t want to be in bed next to you. Can you blame me?”

  “All because of a fucking kiss? Seriously Aubrey, it was just a kiss.”

  My anger flared. Fine, he said it was just a kiss. I overpowered
my fear and grabbed Brett by the back of the neck. Before he could process what I was doing, I kissed him. I pulled away and smirked at Jake. He was steaming. Good. I ignored him and walked back into the hotel lobby to retrieve my bag. I hit the call button for the elevator and pushed the button for the third floor. When the doors opened I went to find my room. Once I was safely inside I felt a little relief. At least I gave him a taste of his own medicine. I grabbed my toothbrush and vigorously brushed my teeth. I changed into my pajamas and walked back into the room. I jumped out of my skin when I saw Jake was on the bed in his boxers.

  “Get out!” I yelled.

  “No. The way I see it is that we’re even now.”

  “Jake, there is no even here.” I seethed.

  “I said I was sorry. Jesus, Aubrey, I’m fucking trying here. Why don’t you learn to relax?”

  “Oh I’m sorry, I didn’t realize that you’re an expert on my life and how I should live it. Please continue while I take notes.” I spat.

  I walked over to the balcony and opened the door. I stepped out and lit up. Jake grabbed one of my cigarettes and lit up too. I’d never seen him smoke before. I didn’t do it all the time just when I was angry, scared, or frustrated. It helped take the edge off. Tonight I was all three. I stood there and glared at him. I tossed my smoke to the ground.

  “Smoke your cigarette. I hope you choke.” I pushed into him and walked back inside. I thought about locking him out there, but then he would most likely do something stupid and get himself hurt.

  “Aubrey, will you stop already! I’m trying to understand. I wish I could take whatever pain you have away, but I can’t do that if I don’t know what the fucking problem is!”

  “You should have tried to keep your tongue in your mouth. You’re still wearing a lovely shade of slut.” I sneered.